In this post I am journaling about a series of events that took place over the course of about a week's time. I wrote it down for myself, but thought I'd share it to show how things can go smoothly for a long time and then challenges will develop gradually where success was experienced in the past. This week was a red flag that the meds need to be adjusted. The focalin allows my son to focus, but doesn't provide optimal control over his emotional outbursts. We are looking into seeing a specialist who can help fine-tune his medications. I am hopeful. I am also thankful for the teachers and staff at the school that work together with me to support my son.
Day 1: Wednesday. I am at the dentist with one of my children when I realize I had received 2 calls from the school. When I call back the principal tells me my son refused to get on the bus and to please come pick him up. I head to the school and as I pull up I see 2 police cars parked by the front door. My thought, "Uh, oh! This must be bad." As I open the door to the entryway, the resource teacher and psychologist are sitting there. I enter the office to find my son sitting down talking to 2 policemen. I say out loud to the principal who comes to meet me, "This must be bad." She takes me to her office to explain that my son has had a rough afternoon. It started at lunch, continued during gym and the afternoon classwork. When he refused to get on the bus, the school attempted to contact me. When they couldn't reach me a second time, the principal called the police for assistance. (It's school policy to call the police if a parent is unreachable and the child needs transportation home.) She assured me that my son wasn't in trouble, but the officers were taking the opportunity to chat with him about the situation. They were very friendly.
Day 2: Thursday. I decide to avoid further trouble and go pick my son up from school. I wait and wait in the pick up line, but no child. Then the principal comes out and asks me to park and come in. She leads me to his classroom where the asst. principal, classroom teacher and resource teacher are all standing with him outside his classroom. The classroom teacher describes in great detail the behavior he has exhibited that afternoon. He refused to work, scribbled on a worksheet, drew on his hands with a marker, became defiant and disruptive. He was removed from the classroom and as the principal and assistant principal tried to talk with him about his behavior, he kicked the principal and swung his backpack at both of them. The principal then hands me an envelope that contains a letter that states that he's being suspended for the next day because of his aggressive behavior.
Day 3: Friday. He is home with me for the day. He must work with me and stick by me when I am doing things around the house. No video games. No movies. We are able to talk about what happened, but he isn't able to pinpoint what triggered his behavior. I really believe he doesn't know. He feels bad. We talk further and he decides he should apologize to those he hurt or was disrespectful to at school. There are no outbursts during the day.
Uneventful weekend
Day 4: Monday. He gets on the bus and goes to school a little apprehensive about additional consequences because of Thursday. I get a call from the nurse about an hour after school starts. She asks me if he has taken his meds. I check his place at the table and realize he left his medication sitting where he ate breakfast. He probably forgot to take it. She asks me to bring it in. I drop it off at school. He carries it out of the office and heads back to class. When I get home, I receive a second call. This time it's from the asst. principal. My son refused to take his medication because one of his teachers touched it. I talk to him on the phone and get nowhere with him. He is asked to stay in the office until he takes it since he had been disruptive in the classroom. I get a call from the nurse about 30 minutes later that he finally took his meds and headed back to class. Later that afternoon (at the end of the school day) I get a call from the office asking when I will be there to pick my son up. By this time I am in downtown Chicago. My son refused to get on the bus again. He was told specifically to ride the bus home since I would be in Chicago for the afternoon. Finally the principal offers to take him home and asks me to call her the next day to schedule an appointment.
Day 5: Tuesday. Appointment is cancelled because of other time commitments. The teacher e-mails me to tell me he had a good day.
Day 6: Wednesday. No calls during the day. I go to pick my son up from school and the principal comes out to the car to tell me that he had a bad afternoon. He refused to take the math test. He wrote 12's for every answer and was disruptive to the other students. He again writes on his hands with marker and pokes himself with pencils. The principal says that he is unable to listen when he gets like that. She says she'll call me tomorrow and let me know when the team can get together with me. She explains that she would like to brainstorm ideas to help support my son. Whew! I thought she wanted to talk to me about leaving him at school without a ride home the day before.
Day 7: Thursday. I hear nothing from school. Usually no news is good news.
Day 8: Friday before spring break. I pick my son up from school. The resource teacher comes to the car to tell me that he had a great day. She said that Thursday was also a good day. They initiated an incentive of 15 min. of IPad time at the end of the day if he does well after lunch. I think they started that on Thursday. It's a simple modification but seems to be enough to motivate him to stay in control.
Spring Break should provide a needed break for everyone. Starting fresh after a week off may be just what is needed. I hope so.
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